Tuesday, August 01, 2006

I need a break

I came across this picture in an old program I have and it really just suits me to a tee… I sometimes feel like all I do is cook, clean and take care of kids. Don’t get me wrong, I love doing it, but sometimes I feel overworked and overwhelmed. I feel like I am running on auto-pilot and rather then enjoying the time I have with my family I am just going through the motions. It is unfair to them and it is also unfair to me.

I was invited to a crop party this past weekend. I went and had a great time. I didn’t get much work done. I was too busy socializing. We all joked about how I couldn’t get a page done without a child sitting on my lap. It was then I realized that this was the first time in almost two years that I had been somewhere without my children or husband with me. Can you believe that? Two years of being only a wife and Mother. Two years without once taking time for myself. No wonder I am feeling so burned out. I used to always take classes and go to crops. I used to have hobbies and a life that didn’t involve my family. I used to do new things and go new places. Between my family and my outside activities I had such a full life. Where did that fun loving, fulfilled woman go? And why did she just leave this shell of a person behind?

We all know that in order to be a good parent you must first take care of yourself. But is all too easy to just put our own wants and desires on hold. Sometimes--no most--no all times as parents we must take care of our home and family before we are able to do things for ourselves, but we should never forget how much we need time to do things that are just for us.

This post is a promise to myself to get out and do more things without my husband and children. Not so that I can be away from them, but so that I can be more appreciative of the time I spend with them. Also I will have stories to contribute to the conversations we have that are always about everybody else, because I have nothing to tell. I am making a commitment to be more than just a mother and wife, to do more than just cook, clean and take care of family, to contribute more to my family by being nicer to myself.


At 1:55 PM , Blogger Ms E said...

As I read your post it brought me back 5 years when all I did was cook, clean and run after my 5 children and husband all day long. Now that I'm a single full-time working Mom and College Student hitting 40 might I add, I miss those Stay-At-Home-Mom days. If I had the choice to be in the workforce or be at home with, now my grandbabies, I would definitely choose the latter. There are just so many things that I miss out on being away from my family for the most part of the day. Consider yourself Blessed to be at home with your family everyday. I understand and agree that we all need a lil time for ourselves, but overall you really do have the best job in the world.


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